How To Prevent Your Emotions From Alienating People

When we carefully examine our negative emotions we always find them directed against some other person. Even when we seem to resent our circumstances we secretly or openly blame others for those circumstances. So it is important that we clarify our feelings as they relate to other people. It clears everything in a surprising way.

It is strange how human beings miss the most obvious facts about their negativities toward others. A hateful man seldom reasons, “Hatred toward others makes me miserable, so in the name of common sense I’d better abandon it.” Rarely does a resentful person think, “Resentment of other people drains my strength and destroys my mental powers, so I’d better clear it from my life.” Negative feelings so cloud a man with darkness that he cannot see what he is doing to himself.

Sooner or later, all of us must see that negative feelings toward another person is like tossing dust at him while the wind blows against us. It all comes back. This is not merely a moralistic teaching or Sunday school lesson; it is a basic and inescapable Law of Life.

Commented Paul B., “I know you are right, but you arouse contradiction in me. I want to grasp these ideas, but I also resist them. What is all this?”

“It is a good sign. It means that you are challenging your false notions – and they don’t like it. Remember, all inner contradiction is between the truth which is in you and falsehood. Keep challenging your false ideas. As they disappear, conflict ceases. Then you are at peace with the truth.”

Added Barbara L., “But what about people who do not challenge their false assumptions? Are they peaceful? Are they without this inner battle?”

“No. Their conflict is merely covered up. Most people are subconsciously miserable.”

Don’t be afraid of the added anxiety that arises whenever you challenge a false notion. It is temporary, just as you must temporarily battle the waves in order to arrive at the calm sea beyond the shore. You see, once you challenge your negative feelings they fight back, so your pressure increases for a while.

Most people run for cover whenever a negative feeling is exposed to the light of consciousness, consequently, they remain in darkness. You can be a hero. Dare to stand in the light. After a while, you will see that the very light you once feared is the very light of your life.

Vernon Howard
From Psycho-Pictography